Hi, I'm Emilia Isabelle

Dating Yourself Is Underrated (and You Don’t Ever Have to Share Your Snacks)

Dating yourself is giving main character energy. It’s showing confidence and self-worth. It’s shouting from the rooftops, I can do what I want, and no one will hold me back. Envisage this, you are on your solo date at the cinema with a smug little smirk because no one’s trying to steal your sharebag peanut M&Ms, no one’s asking you whose that or breathing heavily next to you, and- best of all- you genuinely love your own company.

The Magic of Self-love

We spend so much time waiting to be chosen in life whether it is- by a partner, by a friend group, by an employer or as a dance partner at the new salsa class you decided to take up after you convinced yourself you’ll be the next professional on Strictly Come Dancing. But what if we did a 360 spin and realised… we can just choose ourselves? Right now. As is. Nothing more, nothing less.

As Roxie Nafousi says in Confidence, self-love isn’t only about bubble baths and positive affirmations. It’s about honouring your worth, daily, and not outsourcing your joy to other people – time is our most valuable currency, after all!

So here’s your daily reminders that you might want to shout at yourself in the mirror:
You cannot seek in others what you haven’t yet given yourself.
You want loyalty? Start being loyal to your own needs.
You want admiration? You want love? It starts with you giving this to yourself!

Paul McKenna talks about Power Manifesting– aligning your inner state with the life you want to live. But how can you manifest a love-filled life when your inner narrative is basically, “I’ll be lovable once someone else says so”?

Nope, sorry, we aren’t doing that anymore. Life is way too short for all of that nonsense.

Let’s start here.

Embracing You

• Buy yourself flowers. This is something I now do weekly, and my son loves it, too. There really is something about a fresh bouquet, so treat yourself, babes.
• Go to dinner alone or order a takeaway without calling out to pretend there are other people enjoying it with you. Own it. Chow down your Chow Mein with no regrets.
• Take mirror selfies because you like your outfit, not because you need validation. You don’t even need to post it on socials. This is for you.
• Build a life so lovely and wholesome, you’re not desperate to fill it- you’re just open to sharing it if the right person adds to the joy you already built.

Aloneness doesn’t have to mean loneliness. It can be living in a state of utter peace, the kind that makes you magnetic. Because when you love yourself loudly, completely, and unapologetically, everything else gets better, too.

Relationships feel less desperate or forced. Friendships feel more aligned. And your self-esteem doesn’t shatter every time someone ghosts you (their loss, truly).

So, if this were your life forever- just you, your playlists, your solo cinema nights, your cosy home filled with the scent of your fresh flowers and the cake you baked for dessert- could/would you still be happy?

If the answer isn’t yes yet, that’s okay. It’s a practice. One date with yourself at a time.

When you start to really enjoy your own company, you’ll realise how much you have to offer the world and the right person when they make an appearance.