Hi, I'm Emilia Isabelle

Lucky You!

The other day a friend said to me, “you’re so lucky you can send your son to holiday club during the six-week holidays.”

At first, her words caught me off guard. Lucky? I was perplexed because from where I stand, it doesn’t always feel that way. To be able to afford that club, I work a full time job (which I am grateful for and extremely fortunate to do a job I love) that said I wake up at 5am, I’m at work 8–4, I squeeze in the gym where I can, then it’s cooking, cleaning, school runs, endless to-do lists and constant rushing around. There are no rest and no days off. Truthfully, I’d rather be spending more time with my son than working my ass off just to keep all the plates spinning but please don’t confuse this with a lack of gratitude because the life I have and we’ve created is abundant in every way.

But her comment stuck with me. From her perspective, without that option, it looked enviable. For her, having the chance to send her child somewhere safe and fun during the holidays would feel like a blessing. I was going to respond, but I took a step back for a moment, and I realised it’s all about perspective.

We so often look at someone else’s life with rose-tinted glasses. We see one part of it, one privilege, one opportunity, and we tell ourselves, “I wish I had that.” But do we actually want the whole life behind it? Probably not. My friend doesn’t see my early mornings, the pressure of bills, the rare nights out, the constant juggle. Just like I don’t see the hidden struggles behind the things I admire in other people’s lives.

We are all only seeing the highlights which has been heightened even more by social media. We’ve convinced ourselves that the perfectly curated videos of couples eating home-made pasta in Rome in front of the Trevi Fountain and the family pictures with the Rudolph and Santa at Lapland are every day when the reality is their a snapshot. I’m not saying it’s not real, but this isn’t people’s every day!

We forget that everyone’s life is layered. The things that look effortless or “lucky” usually come with sacrifices and trade-offs that aren’t obvious from the outside.

Now, when I catch myself admiring someone else’s situation, I stop and ask: Would I really want to swap everything? Their struggles as well as their highlights? The answer is almost always no. What I’m really craving isn’t their whole life, it’s one aspect. And that’s actually a gift to notice, because it shows me exactly what I need to nurture in my own.

Envy doesn’t have to be heavy, you can use it as a compass. It can point us inward instead of outward, reminding us that what we admire in others is usually something we’re capable of creating for ourselves.

So next time you find yourself thinking, “lucky them,” try asking instead, “what is this showing me about what I want to build in my own life?”. I guarantee you probably wouldn’t swap your life, you’d just reshape it, and that’s entirely within your reach.